Writings on Christianity

10 Guiding Principles for Handling Conflict in Marriage (Tsouloufis)

My friend Dan Tsouloufis wrote some helpful principles for handling conflict in marriage. Here it is:

Many years ago, back in 2012, I put together some “guiding principles” for couples to think about as they attempt to communicate better and resolve conflict better. Sometimes couples establish poor habits of communicating and they don’t truly resolve conflict, since they find it too difficult or too painful. Thus, their unresolved conflict gradually builds layers of resentment and mistrust over the years, becoming much harder to break these patterns and achieve true intimacy.

Listed below are ten guiding principles for handling conflict within marriage. I actually came up with these principles when I was counseling a particular married couple at our church at the time. I believe the key Scripture passage we should use when counseling couples (whether married or considering marriage) is Ephesians 5:21-33, since it emphasizes the servant-leadership role required of the husband, especially verses 25 through 27. Also, 1 Peter 3:7 is helpful for husbands to honor and respect their wives.